Wednesday, July 16, 2014

#TeachersWrite Day Six

I have only used Word to type up my story.  After reading today's blog by Kate Messner, I'm definitely going to look into this writing program, Scrivener. Just after looking at it for a few minutes, I feel it will help me with my writing and actually get writing more.

She also talked about how to go about writing a professional book.  I've looked in to writing an article for EL from ASCD.  I think an article is a good way to start then maybe move into a book using Stenhouse or Heineman.


Ben Candido- 8 key points of change in his life

1.  Ben begins career of a fisherman on dad's friend's boat (senior year in high school).
2.  He dates Lorraine (throughout high school) and proposes to her at their graduation.
3.  Just before his wedding, Ben changes to be a lobsterman for a little bit better money where he meets his boss, Cal.
4.  Six months after their wedding, Ben and Lorraine find out that she's pregnant.
5.  On the boat, Ben tells Cal about his worries of not having enough money for the baby. Cal offers him a special "pay day".
6.  Ben does a special "pay day" behind Cal's back.  Cal finds out and threatens him and his family.
7.  Ben sends pregnant Lorraine away and never contacts her again.
8.  After Cal's death, Ben attempts to contact his daughter (freshman year in college) because he believes it is now safe to do so.

     A ring with a diamond speck burned a hole in Ben's jean pocket.  In his silver cap and gown, he stood in a single file line with the rest of his graduating class just outside the metal gym doors.  The ring had been in his pocket for over a week waiting for the right moment.  Right now it started to feel like the time, but Lorraine was at the back of the line while Ben was about sixty people in front of her.  Having the last name of Zapata always had Lorraine out of reach throughout all of high school.  Not in the same homeroom. Not near her every time a teacher sat them by alphabetical order on the first day of school.
     "Ben, what's with all the looking over your shoulder? Is my hair sticking out in a crazy way with this awful cap?" asked Liz trying to push her hair back under her cap without it falling off again.
     "Huh? What are you talking about?"
     "Why do you keep looking at me?"
     "I'm not looking at you."
     "Oh, I get it.  You're trying to find Lorraine.  You just can't live a few minutes without her. Can you?"
     "Whatever, Liz." Ben said as he left his spot in line and began walking towards the back.  All the others watched and began to whisper to each other wondering what he was doing.
     "Ben, Mr. Barbosa's going to have your head if your still out of line when we start to move!" said Jose as Ben passed him.
     As Ben neared Lorraine, the ring grew hotter and hotter.  He couldn't possibly keep this inside any longer.  The entire graduating class and their families knew how much he loved her, but he wanted everyone to know.
     "Ben, what are you doing? Get back in line," said Lorraine motioning with her hand towards the front of the line.  "You can get a kiss from me once you walk across the stage."  Lorraine smiled knowing that one kiss was never enough for him.
     Suddenly, Ben dropped to his knees.  He lifted one knee while taking his hand out of his pocket.  "Lorraine, will you be mine forever?" he asked while the entire line started to form into a semi-circle around them.  "You have been part of my heart for so long.  I can't imagine not seeing you every day.  With school ending, I feel like I won't see you as much, and my heart can't bear that.  Marry me, Lorraine."
     Unable to find words, Lorraine held out her hand while shaking her head yes.  Already standing, Ben put the ring on her ring and lifted her into the air.
    "Now can we get back to this little event called graduation?" said Mr. Barbosa who had popped his head out the gym door to let them all know it was time.
This is a very first draft with no revisions.  I'd love for some feedback in the comments section.

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